37 - Martin Skrtel

[AJ]

Fantastisk at Skrtel er tilbage. Spørgsmålet er om han kommer til at kunne gå direkte ind i startopstillingen igen men i hvert fald en rigtig god nyhed. Nu mangler vi bare lige Torres og der går forhåbentlig heller ikke særligt lang tid før han vil være tilbage på vores hold.

Aurelio?

Ham anser jeg faktisk for værende mindst ligeså vigtig at få tilbage som Torres.
Aurelio har i denne sæson spillet noget af det mest rutinerede, kølige, rolige, cool i karrieren. Han har udvist stort overblik, hvilket ikke kan siges om Dossena.

Der er jeg nu ikke helt enig. Torres er nu en spiller vi nødigt kan undvære, desværre har det været tilfælde det meste af denne sæson.

Det er klart, at Torres er en bedre spiller end Aurelio, men når alternativet er Dossena, der ofte er modstanderens farligste mand, må jeg sige, at jeg savner Aurelio (endnu) mere.

[Aarhus]

Så skulle Skrtel være tilbage for fuld styrke. Det bliver som en helt ny signing. Jeg glæder mig til at se ham drøne ind i tacklingerne igen.

[Arturo Bandini]

Så skulle Skrtel være tilbage for fuld styrke. Det bliver som en helt ny signing. Jeg glæder mig til at se ham drøne ind i tacklingerne igen.

Jeg ELSKER Martin Skrtel!!!

[Kofoed]

Endnu en god julegave.

Jeg tror at Skrtel er utrolig sulten, så hvis jeg var Boltons angreb ville jeg passe på

[Styf]

If you can see Martin Skrtel, he can see you. If you can't see Martin Skrtel, you may be moments away from certain death.

Det er sjovt fordi det er sandt.

[Aarde]

Den fortjener sgu lige endnu en tur på toppen:

I heard that Skrtel once had a heart attack...the heart lost.

Martin Skrtel does not sleep. He waits.

Martin Skrtel could strangle you with a cordless phone.

Quentin Tarantino was asked to direct a biography about Martin Skrtel. He passed. It was too violent.

Martin Skrtel lost his virginity before his father.

Apple pays Skrtel 99p every time he listens to a song.

Einsteins original theory of relativety was: if Martin Skrtel kicks you your relatives will feel it.

Once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.

Martin Skrtel does not own a house. He walks into random houses and people move.

Martin Skrtel does not run. He jumps on the spot and the earth moves into position

If two Martin Skrtels tackled each other at the same time, time would collapse and the Earth would cease to exist.

Martin Skrtel doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage

Martin Skrtel is allowed to talk about Fight Club.

They once made a Martin Skrtel toilet paper, but there was a problem - it wouldn't take $hit from anyone.

Martin Skrtel puts the laughter in manslaughter.

Martin Skrtel doesnt shave; he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Martin Skrtel is Martin Skrtel.

As soon as he was born he grabbed the midwife, the doctors and nurses by their ankles and slapped their arses then went on a 22 pint drinking spree.

Martin Skrtel sees dead people, then kills them again.

Martin Skrtel made BA get on a plane without the use of drugs

When Martin Skrtel types LOL you can actually hear him laugh out loud.

When Bruce Banner gets mad, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Martin Skrtel.

When Martin Skrtel was born, the only person who cried was the doctor. Never slap Martin Skrtel.

If you can see Skrtel he can see you, if you can't see Skrtel you may only be seconds away from death.

Scientists believed diamond to be the hardest substance known to man - until they discovered Martin Skrtel.

Martin Skrtel once did a two-footed side tackle. He has vowed never to do it again though; one Grand Canyon is enough.

Martin Skrtel can put a Rowntrees Fruit Pastille in his mouth for a full 14 and a half minutes without chewing..

When Martin Skrtel went to transylvania he was bitten by three vampiers and they all became human.

In ancient China there is a legend that one day a child will be born from a dragon, grow to be a man, and vanquish evil from the land. That man is not Martin Skrtel, because Martin Skrtel killed that man.

One day Skrtel walked into McNasty's an asked for a KFC family bucket... and got one

Martin Skrtel played russian roulete with a fully loaded gun and won.

Duncan Ferguson has stated that if he was playing in the Premier League these days he'd carry a can of petrol with him in games against Liverpool. He says that if Martin Skrtel was about to slide tackle him he'd burn himself to death because it would be less painful than the tackle. When informed of this, Skrtel replied that he would have resuscitated Ferguson... And slide-tackled him to death anyway.

Now Ferguson, like the boogeyman, checks his closet for Skrtel before going to bed.

There is no theory of evolution just a list of creatures Martin has allowed to live.

Martin Skrtel has two speeds: tackle and kill

A handicap parking sign does not signify that a spot is available for disabled people. It is in fact a warning that the spot belongs to Martin Skrtel and that you will become handicapped if you park there.

Martin Skrtel can predict the shuffle on his iPod.

Martin Skrtel can do a wheelie on a unicycle.

When Martin Skrtel deletes files from his computer, he doesn't send them to the Recycle Bin. He tackles them to hell.

The Fountain of Youth is actually Martin Srktel sweat.

[Alex Brockins]

Chokerende præstation i aftes. Agger bør helt sikkert starte de næste par kampe.

[Drezz]

Chokerende præstation i aftes. Agger bør helt sikkert starte de næste par kampe.

Ja, virkelig en skidt indsats. Og her tænker jeg ikke kun på udligningsmålet. Han virkede utrolig rusten samtidig med han begik utrolig mange unødvendige frispark.

[AJ]

Skrtel lavede utvivlsomt fejl, men han havde også mange gode aktioner. Jeg synes folk undervurderer hans tekniske kunnen helt vildt ift. fx Carragher's. Han laver nogle gange nogle hovedløse ting, ja, men han har altså også vist, at han kan føre bolden frem.
Desuden var det ikke alle frisparkene, der vitterligt skulle have været dømt.

Jeg tror helt seriøst, at Agger ville have haft flere problemer med Anichebe og Cahill end Skrtel og Hyppen havde i går.

ps. vi skal dog stadig forlænge med Agger hurtigst muligt.

[Styf]

Skrtel er kun steget i mit heraki efter jeg helt tilfældigt mødte ham i en Armani butik i Liverpools centrum sammen med nogle af hans venner. Det var sgu cool. Synes det er så fedt at stjernerne bare kan gå frit rundt på gaden.

[LFC Søren]

Skrtel er kun steget i mit heraki efter jeg helt tilfældigt mødte ham i en Armani butik i Liverpools centrum sammen med nogle af hans venner. Det var sgu cool. Synes det er så fedt at stjernerne bare kan gå frit rundt på gaden.

Styf & Skrtel lyder som om du har haft en god tur. Måske Skrtel var rundt og hente nogle beskyttelses penge.

[Styf]

Skrtel er kun steget i mit heraki efter jeg helt tilfældigt mødte ham i en Armani butik i Liverpools centrum sammen med nogle af hans venner. Det var sgu cool. Synes det er så fedt at stjernerne bare kan gå frit rundt på gaden.

Styf & Skrtel lyder som om du har haft en god tur. Måske Skrtel var rundt og hente nogle beskyttelses penge.

Ja vi havde en kanon tur og kan kun klage over resultatet. Troede aldrig jeg skulle sige det men de mange oplevelser rundt omkring i Liverpool og mødet med både Agger og Skrtel samt stemningen på Anfield overskyggede i den grad skuffelsen over resultatet.

[Arturo Bandini]

Jeg ville sataneddeme være bange for at kritisere Skrtel.
Lige pludselig står han bare bag en...

Prøv forresten at kig dig selv i spejlet og sig Skrtel 5 gange.

[LFC-suarez]

Tænker på at købe en Liverpool trøje med Skrtel

Hvad siger i????

[Hekkem]

Synes jeg er en dårlig ide. Jeg mener Martin Skrtel er ganske overvurderet. Jeg vil langt hellere have en spillende midterforsvar end en der blot kan forsvarer, hvilket jeg mener ej heller han er verdens bedste til.